Rambles of a confused mind

There is so much on my mind that I really have no idea where to start.

I guess I will start by saying the weather is amazing! Lately, it has been pretty warm outside. A little windy, but hey, when you live next to the mountains, it is to be expected. I would love to go for a hike today, but I am not so sure that will happen.

Which brings me to my next thought in my head. I am really hurt and upset currently. I don't know really why I am feeling SO down about this but I really do. I feel SO left out. Two wives from my husband's company were tagged in pictures from 2 days ago. They went on a hike. I don't work, I have no children, I am really honestly free. I thought I got along well with both of these wives, but now I just completely feel left out! I don't know the whole story, who invited who, how they got it all together, etc., but I can tell you I have expressed to both of them MANY times that I would love to hang out with them or to do something together. I have been working out, HARD, and really working toward some goals, and a hike would have been a really nice change of pace. But instead, for some reason that day, I was at home, bummed out for some reason, not wanting to work out, and just really blah. Didn't help that my dr. appt. I had the day before that wasn't exactly the best appt. I have ever had.

Which comes to the next thought in my head. I have had knee problems since I was around 14 years old. My entire Jr. year and Sr. year of high school I went though physical therapy for my knee. That was all they ever did for me. My doctor at the time wasn't the best doctor I could have seen, and if I wasn't in a major sport, I was not seen as a priority. It pretty much got put on the back burner and I was told to deal with it. Well, anyone who knows me well, knows that I love to run. I love to just go for a jog or something. Clear my head. I have done this for a long time. Well just this past 2 months, I started jogging outside again because the weather here has been amazing and I HATE running on treadmills. (Which I did throughout the winter) Well, on one of my first jogs, I felt a snap in my knee, pain, and it has stayed and gets worse with walking, going to the dog park, going up and down steps, bending down, etc. I made an appt. for my knee along with some other things, and finally had my appt. The doctor told me he thinks I may have a meniscus tear and he wants an MRI and I had to get an xray. I am bummed because not only will this, along with everything else going wrong in my life it seems, will be another wall in the road I am traveling that could potentially stop me in achieving my dreams. Surgery will hurt me BIG TIME, however, I am glad I am finally getting answers and I am getting some much needed attention for my knee.

Anyway, on another note, I am off to another day, and I am sure I will be on again. Just a few things I REALLY needed to get out. I know it may seem confusing seeing as only a FEW people know everything going on and can actually fill in the blanks, but it's another gorgeous day out and I plan to be outside for some of it. Have a great weekend!